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Maybe people will start using their brain if we advertise it as a trending app.

I like hashtags, because they look like waffles.

Keep rolling your eyes. Maybe you will find a brain somewhere.

Enjoy at least one sunset per day! – Modern family.

I followed a diet but it didn’t follow me back, so unfollowed it.

I’m not saying it was aliens, but it was Aliens!

Crossfit? I play real sports

How did I get back to my crib last night

I like my coffee just like me. Too hot for you.

I followed a diet, but then it didn’t follow me back. So, guess what – I’ve unfollowed it.

Wine + dinner = Winner

Dogs have mastered. Cats have staff.

Find your tribe. Love them hard.

We are all born mad. Some remain so.

I finally realized that people are prisoners of their phones… that’s why it’s called a “cell” phone.

Friends pick us up when we fall down and if they can’t, they lie down with us and listen for a while.

Me and my best friend can communicate just with face expressions.

How do you know what it’s like to be stupid if you’ve never been smart?

Kinda classy, kinda hood.

Create your own sunshine.